I’m dying, of that I’m certain, of what is less clear. For the past 72 hours my ears, eyes, sinus cavity and chest have been under constant attack. Is this the flu? Ah, it feels much worse than any mere flu.
The disease also has brain wasting properties. My lack of concentration levels rivals only those born after 1997, the very age group which scientists proved recently to be brain dead. You’re unaware of said theorem? According to doctor once employed by the Weekly World News, Gameboy + McDonald’s + No exercise = Reduced brain wave activity. And just think we’ve got a whole generation of them.
At present, I can concentrate just long enough to write the blog, then must blow my nose and wash my hands so as not to infect the wife with this toxic agent.
Is there a doctor reading this? Based on my symptoms tell me, how long do I have left? I can take it. I’ve known the bitter taste of rejection. This current setback is just one chapter of longer tale. Oh yes, I shall prevail. Even over insurmountable odds and deadly afflictions.
Excuse me please, it’s time for another trip to the bathroom.
URGENT!
I’m preempting the blog I wrote for this breaking message.
A prospective agent requested to see the first 3 chapters of The Ridge Runner today.!
Very cool. This is a good next step for Mike Brody. I’ll keep you posted as things develop. Nope, I’m not saying who the prospective agent is. Nope, I don’t know if they will decide to represent me. Remember publishing is a very, very conservative business and things like decisions take a long time and this is just one more in a series of steps.
What I do know at this time is that they want to see more material, so more material they shall get.
You know, the Globey’s
The wife and I saw the Harlem Globetrotters this week. This year marks their 75th year of doing that Globetrotting thing. Here’s some strategies for maximum enjoyment.
Pre-game:
1) Bring children to the game. Lots of them. The larger your brood the better. If you lack a brood, carjack a boy or girl scout troop en route to the game.
2) Make sure the children have empty stomachs. Deprive them of food for at least six hours beforehand. Never fear, once inside, there’s plenty of refined sugar available.
3) Purchase one (1) mini globetrotters style basketball for every two children in your brood. That way they have something to throw against the wall AND something to fight over.
Game:
1) Ignore your hopped up, basketball toting child until halftime.
2) Enjoy the comic genius of the world famous Globetrotters as they wipe up the court with their opponent. They are enormous talents.
Halftime:
1)Either feed the child more sugar or take it home. Whichever stops the screaming.
Post game:
1) If you haven’t bought the child a mini-basketball by the conclusion of the game, now’s the time to purchase them an oversized Globetrotter jersey.
2) If there’s sugar left for sale, please purchase it for immediate injection. Those kids need a quick boost of energy so they can play a basketball game in the aisles as 3,000 people try to exit.
State of the Union
Warning, this blog is very unfunny, but I need to get a few announcements out of the way and Saturday is a good day for housekeeping. Or so the wife tells me when she leaves for work.
1)Site updates. Tech guy worked his little fingers off the last day or so to add some reader requested enhancements. The 2 most major changes:
a)Email a link – at the bottom of every blog, everywhere blogs appear on the site, is a new link named, uh, email a link. Clicking it takes you to a form where you can email your friends a link to that particular blog. Give it a whirl. Now it’s even easier to send someone a link to the site.
b)Karma ratings. Perhaps you noticed other new links at the bottom of the blogs. Those are for you to assign karmic ratings to a particular blog entry. Anywhere a blog appears, you have the option of indicating either you like, are neutral or you hate a given blog. This way I can separate the clunkers from the hits. Your karmic ratings move blogs up and down the ranking list in real time. If you want to see the rankings without voting, click the Reader’s Ratings at the left.
2)Other stuff. Still no agent, but I do have a pile of rejections. I thought it would take longer to get this many no’s, so I must be doing something right. At least they’re reading my queries. : )