Yesterday was all smiles with the a splendid and overdue resignation of Dan Rather, now it’s all cries over the latest assault on decency. For what seems like the fourth time in a six years the Post Office announced a rate increase on first class stamps, effective in 2005. This sets the toll to 41 cents. How precious.

Every few years costs increase across the board, Amtrak goes bankrupt, and the Postal Service raises rates. Thank goodness for consistency.

Well instead of grumbling from my armchair at this affront, I have a plan.

Tomorrow as I send two turkeys into the long goodnight, lowering them slowly into a stainless steel container filled with boiling peanut oil, I shall give thanks for the eight notches on my frying belt. They can take my money, but they can’t take my turkeys!

At last some good tidings – after twenty four excruciating years – Dan Rather has quit CBS Evening News. Thank you, Mr Rather. It’s going to be a much lovelier Christmas.

Dan Rather commented today, �It has been, and remains, an honor to be welcomed into your homes in the evening and I thank you for the trust you have given me.�

Not every home Mr. Rather, so hold the thanks please. You weren’t welcome in mine. And I didn’t trust you either. Just �talking tough� with Richard Nixon doesn’t make one a hard nosed journalist. Any mammal with a pulse could find issue with Dick and take him to task.

Years ago a street thug beat Mr. Rather senseless, screaming �Whats the frequency Kenneth.� over and over. For that event you have my sympathy. For nearly a quarter century of professional media service, you have my respect. But for your blatant, unrepentant and relentless bias in the news room, you have my scorn, sir.

Mr. Rather, I wish you the best of luck in all future endeavors. May your career not be judged by the single event that precipitated your resignation, and may the same compassion extended to those with differing political beliefs be extended to you.

Yahoo has a story this morning about Bill Gates, who besides being the richest man in the world, is also the most spammed. Ah well, with great wealth comes great annoyances.

Each day more than four million messages speed off for Mr. Gates’ inbox, but sophisticated filtering programs and an IT department dedicated to clearing out unwanted emails, filters and traps the spam. Apparently even with the best and the brightest MS has to offer, a few pieces of the dreaded stuff still find the target.

Gee, Bill it’s real neat that to have 58 billion dollars and a company worth more than the GDP of Israel. Nothing can touch that sort of achievement. But how about sharing this nifty filtering technology with your customers? Must it just be a proprietary MS secret to wake up and not have krillions of messages about penis extension, breast augmentation, hot moms and their college aged neighbors, or counterfeit Viagra and Cialis?

billg AT microsoft, I beseech you: forget about encouraging India to practice safe sex for a moment and return my inbox to the full and upright position. Release this magic program – and lay them spammers down!

Just in from Iowa, a wild turkey has seized complete control of traffic patterns! Each morning during rush hour, Jake lurks at the roadside. When drivers slow to admire his dashing good looks, this Terroristic Tom rushes the motorists, and halts their cars. And what of the motorists that step out of their vehicles and attempt to shoo Jake? He circles their car and makes wild turkey gestures.

Read about Jake the mad turkey

Now, why mention this turkey harassment? Three reasons. First, next week writer guy sends two turkeys to the great beyond in the trusty frying kit, so it’s topical. Second, I didn’t know there were enough cars in Iowa for traffic. Finally, a bizzare nature story trumps the bear who drank a case and half of beer.