Author: Writer guy

So the fear…

Writer guy

I aborted the prior entry halfway through because my thoughts on The Confession were in stasis, and rather than dodge the the task until they gelled—which could have been days, and in fact that’s how much time passed between entries—I instead jotted a partial note and moved along. Writing what I could manage in the moment felt more effective than saying nothing at all for quite awhile.

The question stands. Just how is The Confession scary? Well, it’s not a horror story. Blood and gore don’t line the seams. I wouldn’t brand it a thriller, either. Right now there is a twist ending written before even the first chapter, though the scene could change substantially if the character arcs dictate it.

So it’s doubtful the subject matter frightens me. Perhaps fear came from writing quickly. Yes, it just could be that. What a handy culprit, too, one right at the edge of the keyboard. Why not cite the speed of travel? My experience with 1,500 word drive-bys for long periods is nil. Ah, but a few days of perspective betrayed a different cause entirely. My bias towards the material is the problem, I believe.

With the novel I planned, rethought, and designed scenes with an audience at the forefront. Time and again, a primary question guided the architecture. Can a reasonable person with limited or no exposure to the subject matter follow the action? When a situation felt flat, I amped it up. Wherever possible, cliffhangers rammed one scene to the next. At all times, I kept the ball rolling. In short, I wanted to write a story that I would pay for, moved at a hearty clip, and was a good escape from drear. And I did that. But The Confession is a different beast.

It’s about self-satisfaction, rather than entertaining others. My true fear is that the story is too personal. Five plus weeks invested so far, and not once have I thought about how a scene might read to an outsider, or whether a slight tweak could heighten the suspense. I sit, write, then repeat. All I know is that I like working on it. Which is very different from liking what’s on the page.

Very different, indeed.

A brave new world

Writer guy

Nearing the 30,000 word mark of The Confession, the odds of this manuscript ending in short story land–a very long short, so it seems–approximate zero. Can’t determine if it’s a novella or novel yet. Either form is equally possible, as I refuse to inject my preconceptions into the process. All I know: When making time for this project, the pages happen. The real fun is I have no idea what store the content rises from; the situations just appear. That mysterious genesis happened to me before, though only in the midst of a short story.

Speaking of narrative streaks, one of my favorite bits of writing lore is Ray Bradbury and Fahrenheit 451. Stone broke, he rented a typewriter at the rate of a dime per hour. The story went, he pumped less than ten bucks in the slot for a first draft. More amazing, his butt only left the seat for bathroom breaks and sleep. In other words, he wrote essentially straight through the days, ripping off an incredible stream of fiction. Just hearing that fact in his radio interview with Don Swaim, I had much to learn from Bradbury.

His achievement planted a seed in my subconscious.

I wondered if it was possible to write quickly. Well, now I know I can rack em up, particularly if I am scared. And I’m terrified. The fear is not because the piece has creepy elements or is in any way horror. No, it’s for another reason altogether.

To be continued…

2007 Where do you go

Writer guy

With a new year starting in less than 48 hours, an annual resolution lists seems important, and maybe more so than usual. My approach to goal setting diverges sharply from last year; each one hinges solely upon my actions.

Before listing specific action items, though, let me explain the rationale for this change, as the reasoning behind those points are actually more important than the goals themselves.

The departure traces back to a lesson about wrestling the universe: When trying to exert control that is not mine to own, while it may appear like my efforts affect the outcome—I might even believe, or delude myself briefly that my influence will out—when facing a superior force with that attitude, I will lose. On the surface, that rings a bit defeatist. Incredibly it’s the reverse, because the battle is actually me vs. myself to begin with.

Well, myself and the trolls. And again, I almost jump ahead of the point. It’s definition time.

By trolls I mean obstacles—real or imagined—that obstruct personal development. Each writer faces their own breed of the little nasties. By superior force I refer to the energy spent worrying about how someone might receive, or not receive my writing. That mentally created troll rates as my single biggest stumbling block since embarking on this journey. Approval—or rejection—of others is a greater force largely because I regarded it as such. Maybe it wasn’t ever a problem, yet I stressed until it became one. A troll feed; a troll nurtured; a troll grew fat and menacing thanks to my own hand. See ultimately, a troll is only a cretin in the way. They block the bridge, because that is their job. Perhaps something to do with unions, maybe. But answer the question and the troll shall let ye pass. Argue with the troll’s right to guard the bridge and ye shall both grow gray together.

Effective immediately, I will no longer aid, feed or comfort the enemy. In fact, I will no longer consider the troll an enemy. He’s only doing what he must. And I’m doing what I must, too.

Here are my answers for the trolls in 2007:

1) Enter twenty(20) fiction writing contests that pay cash prizes in excess of $300 and publication in a respected periodical, annual or magazine.

2) Pitch the novel to 40 agents/editors. Roughly 1.5 individuals in the business per week. Er, Roughly 1 individuals in the business every 6 working days. Or 1 agent per week, excluding summer break.

3) Launch guerrilla marketing campaign for the novel. The details of this plan must remain under wraps because it’s the only truly original idea I’ve ever had about hawking fiction. If it works, I’ll gladly disclose the details.

4) Finish a draft of The Confession before beginning another large writing project.

To all who read this site: I wish you all the best in 2007.

Good Shepherd

Writer guy

As an agency whose usefulness has long provided fire to its critics, the CIA is a more or less a mystery—an entity answerable only to people who have no interest publicizing its successes of failures. True, they have a web site, but that does not illuminate even the basic function of this covert organization. Maybe we’re all better off not knowing how the trains run on schedule, only that they do.

The Good Shepherd, a film loosely based on the career of James Angleton a counterintelligence operative, does not examine the efficacy of the CIA either. Nor does it glamorize the mission or work. This film is not about cloak dagger or spy games. Good Shepherd does paint a harrowing picture caused by a lifetime spent serving the agency. If the experiences of the character Edward Wilson are rooted even part in fact, his story is a tortured one, indeed.

It’s a long film, close to the three hour mark. It’s littered with moments of quality drama. There’s a rich narrative, though perhaps a bit dense given the non linear plot structure.

What works about Good Shepherd:

  1. A very complicated set of characters and back story in an entertaining package.

  2. Cast is top shelf all the way across. Every key actor performs well.

  3. Direction. More films by Robert De Niro!

Areas of improvement:

  1. Very Godfather II esque vibe. Perhaps a result of Francis Ford Coppola’s involvement, several scenes draft too far into that well for my taste.

  2. Story arc. Two minor conflicts could have been expanded to major plot points, and buoyed the pace.

Verdict: Matinee, or DVD rental.